You can wear anything you want to anywhere, everyone can. Why don’t we all walk around naked? We ALL have some kind of feeling of shame towards our bodies. Why? Just general society, and how family teaches one to be. If a child is punished or scorned for dressing inappropriately in public, that is probably going to make them grow up to be self conscious about their bodies.. And from my childhood experiences, when we are scorned and told not to do something - we are rarely given any reason why, so we are burdened with trying to figure out what is wrong with us to begin with.

Now, I don’t like how my fat arms look, so I wear long sleeves. It keeps me comfortable, and I wear long sleeved shirts I consider attractive to my fashion sense. But I’ve also worn T-shirts before - hated them, always so long and shapeless - and a few shirts which both had sleeves but also let people see more of my arms.. I loved a shirt I had that was part mesh, and was completely seethrough in the arms. And I was fine! No one went “ew look at those arms!” And even if I got looks behind my back, so fucking what? I am comfortable and I’ll wear my favorite cute shirt if and when I want!

I would always see this girl in highschool, she was fatter than me but she would always wear these miniskirts. The difference was she felt comfortable enough to wear a miniskirt. I thought she looked cute. There was another girl I knew who was shorter than me.. probably somewhere just under 5′0″, with a 52″ waist. I’m not going to say she looked good wearing those T-shirts I hate so much, but she was comfortable. And she got laid about as much as a “dance club” girl - it’d be a stretch to say cheerleader, lol.

Now why am I not getting laid like that? 1 - I’m not really interested in having sex with just any guy. 2 - my boyfriend lives two states away lol.

I think the only time I was really offended by what someone said was a friend of mine, when he said that the kind of girl he is looking for is about my height but with a better body. At which time he weighed 320 lbs. And I only weighed 170 lbs at the time.

Now, I plan on losing weight. Not to “be better than others,” but just to better myself for myself. I wouldn’t mind going to a fat club skinny or not, would be like going to a gay club - going there to have fun. I really feel if people try to hit on me more when I do lose weight, it’d just downright piss me off. Oh well..

Be comfortable!

On the one hand, yay, a place to go and dance.

On the other hand, HEY. This is not fixing anything.

*sigh*

And: I hate myself for needing a plus sized place.

Here’s the question, how do you decide at what point someone is plus sized enough? I mean, i am a third of my medically-appropriate bod weight overweight… but what if (this will never happen) i suddenly managed to slim down?

The problem with dividing into groups is that if the groups aren’t very fluid, problems happen.

Which sucks, because our society is presumably made of adults who should be able to STFU and cope with stuff.

I guess my point is that i want to go to such a club, but would be afraid. And wear tank tops. Somebody has to go firstin our stupid society to make it better for the rest, and i will if you will.

I’m hoping there will be a major backlash against this ‘fat is an epidemic’ stuff, and it will be all right for me to wear pretty things in public.

As for creepy feeders or fetishists…well, everyone has something that turns their crank, but I’d like to not be an object, I prefer being a PERSON, and that’s what bugs me about the fetishists.

And this reminds me that I need to go give my husband some serious lovin’ because even after 10 years and 2.85 kids (only six more weeks to go! WOO!) I still turn his crank.

Rebecca, the porn thing is tricky, because yeah, it’s nice to see that fat porn is finally “mainstream” and not deviant, but all porn objectifies women (and men), that’s what makes it porn. They remove the person and turn them into, well, orifices. However, every now and then, (and I’m going to lose my feminist card for this) it’s not ALWAYS so bad to be an object, with the right person and not Joe Pervert off of the street. I mean, if I bend over and pick something up off of the floor and my husband makes the “mrowr” face at me, it’s kind of nice.

This ranks up their with bbw specific dating websites. I don’t want a man to date me specifically because I’m fat or skinny; I want someone to date me because of me.
Eh. This is a very frustrating topic that I don’t thing anyone besides a bbw women living in a society such as ours would understand.

And oy, I feel thy pain with the “Why would a normal man like to sleep with a fat chick? EW!” mentality. My husband is actually much prettier than I am. and women have a tendency to think he’s dreamy, especially since he’s let his hair grow out and is seriously delicious now (I might be a liiiiiiiiittle bit biased, though), and I’ve seen the “HUH? WHUH?!?!” looks about a million billion times. However, they don’t know the Fat Girl Secret, which is only bestowed upon the men (or women) wise enough to look at the girl inside of the body….we’re wildcats in bed. You don’t have to worry about bruising a fat girl’s bones. We’re very enthusiastic and we’ll wear your ass out. Also, many fat girls (not me, sadly) also have excellent racks.