Unmotivated, and uninspired, and just kind of UN in general.
I got an e-mail recently from a reader that pointed out my recent drizzle of posts and though I was thrilled to receive the letter, I felt like I had let that reader down. I use this blog as a place to exorcise my demons (and just for the record, I first typed “exercise my demons,” as though they need a good cardio workout or somthing). And from what I’ve heard from folks, it seems like a place that some visit for a similar exorcism, just vicariously in their instance. I see the value in this place, I’ve just felt very constrained lately. The things that have been LOUD and in my face lately are the sorts of things that need a measure of respect and privacy. I’ve got some emotional barfing to do, but I don’t want to do it in someone else’s lap, if you know what I mean.
I’m starting to tear up….this sucks.
Any advice from other bloggers out there? How do you reconcile the issue of private conflict and resolution in the public sphere? I would love some advice.
Filed under Schnibbles | Comments (3)Fat Friday (a day late!)
I saw this on GraphJam and found it rather hilarious. Enjoy
~Ellie
Filed under Fat Fridays | Comments (4)Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down
Who would have thought that I would have embraced the apron strings so fully? But that is exactly what has been happening lately. I have taken over the meal planning for the entire family, and it has TOTALLY HELPED MY EATING DISORDER. Nobody is more surprised than me.
The Cute Canadian Geek and I sat down for a Come To Jesus about our lack of a strong daily routine and the way it impacts my eating and his mood. We set up the bare bones structure of a day around meals, waking up and going to bed, time for personal pursuits, and exercise. And you know what? It’s ridiculously liberating.
One of the results has been my taking over the meal planning. At first, I felt very apprehensive because historically, Morgan + Food Choices = Disaster. But this time around, there was another person in the equation, and that has made a huge difference. CCG doesn’t put any input into meals because he’s just not picky and prefers that I take the lead. So being freed up from the anxiety of trying to guess what he wants to eat, I can focus more on what would be good for him to eat. And focusing on that has helped me be more mindful what would be good for ME to eat.
This has totally brought out my inner Holly Homemaker. I make a simple breakfast for us; I pack lunches and snacks for us to take to work; and in the evening I get to make a dinner that we can share. And… I. LOVE. IT. Doing this hits all the right buttons on me. It gives my Caretaker Button a little rub since I enjoy taking care of the people close to me; it hits my Anti-Eating Disorder Button by calming the chaos; and it lets the Valedictorian Button get all tingly, because I do love a sense of accomplishment and a job well done. It’s wonderful to see how much better CCG and I are feeling as this goes on.
I’m interested to see where this goes. Last night I put together a pan of enchiladas. By myself. For the first time ever. It’ll be cooking up tonight so my fingers are crossed for a tasty result!
PS: Y’all should ask Ellie sometime about her crunchy-granola friend that makes her own yogurt and cheese. I can’t even begin to think about tackling something like that.
Filed under BEDhead | Comments (12)